I suppose, perhaps, it is more to me who am childless, and refrain with a certain shock from looking forwards. But, I am sure, in the solid grounds of race, that you have it also in some degree.
I. JAMES, a tenant of the Muirs, in Nether-Carsewell, Neilston, married (1665?) Jean Keir. || | || | || | +-----------------------------------------+ II. ROBERT (Maltman in Glasgow), died 1733, | married 1st; married second, | Elizabeth Cumming. | || | || William (Maltman in || Glasgow). +--------------+ | | | | +-------------+--------------+ III. ROBERT (Maltman ROBERT, MARION, ELIZABETH. in Glasgow), married Margaret Fulton (had NOTE. - Between 1730-1766 flourished a large family). in Glasgow Alan the Coppersmith, who || acts as a kind of a pin to the whole || Stevenson system there. He was caution IV. ALAN, West India to Robert the Second's will, and to merchant, married William's will, and to the will of a Jean Lillie. John, another maltman. || || V. ROBERT, married Jean Smith. | VI. ALAN. - Margaret Jones | VII. R. A. M. S.
Enough genealogy. I do not know if you will be able to read my hand. Unhappily, Belle, who is my amanuensis, is out of the way on other affairs, and I have to make the unwelcome effort. (O this is beautiful, I am quite pleased with myself.) Graham has just arrived last night (my mother is coming by the other steamer in three days), and has told me of your meeting, and he said you looked a little older than I did; so that I suppose we keep step fairly on the downward side of the hill. He thought you looked harassed, and I could imagine that too. I sometimes feel harassed. I have a great family here about me, a great anxiety. The loss (to use my grandfather's expression), the 'loss' of our family is that we are disbelievers in the morrow - perhaps I should say, rather, in next year. The future is ALWAYS black to us; it was to Robert Stevenson; to Thomas; I suspect to Alan; to R. A. M. S. it was so almost to his ruin in youth; to R. L. S., who had a hard hopeful strain in him from his mother, it was not so much so once, but becomes daily more so. Daily so much more so, that I have a painful difficulty in believing I can ever finish another book, or that the public will ever read it.
I have so huge a desire to know exactly what you are doing, that I suppose I should tell you what I am doing by way of an example. I have a room now, a part of the twelve-foot verandah sparred in, at the most inaccessible end of the house. Daily I see the sunrise out of my bed, which I still value as a tonic, a perpetual tuning fork, a look of God's face once in the day. At six my breakfast comes up to me here, and I work till eleven. If I am quite well, I sometimes go out and bathe in the river before lunch, twelve. In the afternoon I generally work again, now alone drafting, now with Belle dictating. Dinner is at six, and I am often in bed by eight. This is supposing me to stay at home. But I must often be away, sometimes all day long, sometimes till twelve, one, or two at night, when you might see me coming home to the sleeping house, sometimes in a trackless darkness, sometimes with a glorious tropic moon, everything drenched with dew - unsaddling and creeping to bed; and you would no longer be surprised that I live out in this country, and not in Bournemouth - in bed.